UpLifts For Life

Freedom is based on truth, and no man is completely free as long as any part of his belief is based on error, for the chains of error bind his mind.  —– N. Eldon Tanner

A society that continually permits anything will lose everything.   —–  Neal A. Maxwell

Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom, must, like men, undergo the fatigue of supporting it.  —– Thomas Paine

Men Of Insight

The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value.  Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular? –David Sarnoff’s associates in response to his urgings for investment in the radio in the 1920s. (Boy where would we be without Talk Radio?)

The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a ‘C,’ the idea must be feasible.
–A Yale University professor in response to Fred Smith’s paper proposing overnight delivery service. (Smith went on
to found Federal Express Corp. FedEx) That is how my teachers treated me… humm.

More From The Court Room

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Uh…. well…
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ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
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ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
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ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
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ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
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ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
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ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him!
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ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
WITNESS: Oral.
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ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Huh?
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This is got to be my favorite.
ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

To all my Lawyer friends, which I have many, please don’t take these personal. Not all attorneys are as good as mind.